The way I understand it, Autumn is the most sincere time of year.
I have always been deeply affected by the fall. It has the most character. It feels the most genuine.
I guess that is the way one behaves after all is said and done.
When I was younger, somewhere in my travels, I heard that the beautiful oranges, the deep reds, the vibrant and mellow yellows, these were the true colors of the leaves.
For preservation, leaves had some chemical or something in them that made them green. Once that chemical runs out, their true colors can be seen.
What a beautifully, tragic, inspirational thought.
You are the most beautiful when you can show your true self.
For preservation you hide your beauty.
Why do you do that?
Is a life without showing your beauty a life at all?
When will you start to live?
I can’t imagine that you would sacrifice your true beauty, your nature, your color, so that you could live a longer mundane life.
I hope it wasn’t my selfish judgmental behavior.
I hope it wasn’t all for my benefit. Living longer so I could be sheltered from the sun. Living so that I could breathe a little better.
I know what it is like. I have hidden my my(true)self for some sort of unsubstantiated manufactured idea of preservation.
It hurt.
Dimming the individual I was so I could exist amongst the masses, the crowd. I played along with everyone.
Green.
Not realizing that it wasn’t just me that was a deep, deep red. I didn’t know that everyone else was hiding their yellows and oranges.
Actually, I feel like if we would have been honest... I feel like if we could have been honest, from the beginning, we would have been so great.
Please don’t hide it. It is beautiful. I swear. They may or may not laugh at or mock you. But I promise you, it is so frikking beautiful.
I am so sorry I had a part in this. I am so sorry that you don’t show your color.
I swear you’re beautiful.
... And if it is only in the Autumn, before you die, that you show yourself, I will be there to spend your last moments with you.